5 Powerful Lessons from a Conversation with a NYT Best Selling Author

Read time: 7 minutes

Welcome to The Ascend Archives Friday Edition where I share insights from the brightest minds in business and life and how I'm applying them to my life.

This week I had a 90 minute conversation with an author of multiple New York Times best selling books. Chances are that you have read one of his books, but you will never know his name. That’s because he is a ghostwriter.

We met at the Austin Entrepreneurial Summit. On day 2 of the conference, we were randomly seated at a table next to each other. By the end of the day, all 6 guys at my table knew a lot about each other: our core values, our business accomplishments, our most meaningful relationships, and our major takeaways from the conference.

But after hours of discussion, this author, we’ll call him Steve, never brought up his ghostwriting business. The only reason I found out about his writing experience was by accident. I shared that I wanted to land another ghostwriting client. Then, one guy at the table pointed at Steve and said “This guy knows a thing or two about ghostwriting”.

Steve blushed and didn’t say anything.

I turn to Steve, “What’s your experience with ghostwriting?”

“I’ve written a few business and self-development books.”

“Anything I might know?”

He rattled off a few books (2 of which I had read) and said he’d be happy to chat about his writing if I had any questions.

I think my mouth dropped open. I couldn’t believe he had written those books with those authors. I definitely had questions. But it wasn’t the right time to dig into it. I thanked him and didn’t mention the ghostwriting for the rest of the day.

Instead, I got his contact info. The next morning I sent him a relevant blog post about a problem he was facing and asked if he was available to chat about his ghostwriting experience.

Turns out he had much more to teach me than just ghostwriting. Here are 5 life lessons from my conversation with a NYT best selling author...

Lesson 1: Write a Shitty First Draft

I asked Steve about his writing process and how he has improved over the years.

He talked about the importance of brevity and how he learns more from editing than actually writing. Then he dropped this golden nugget, “The first draft is a slog. My goal is to write a shitty first draft as fast as possible”.

I immediately resonated with every part of that line.

First, staring at a blank page sucks. Every time I go to write a newsletter, the hardest part is getting started.

Second, my first drafts are always terrible. My sentences are wordy and don’t make sense. Half the time I don’t even know what point I’m trying to get across.

Given it’s tough to get started and the first draft always sucks, it makes total sense to get that done as quickly as possible. That allows him to move on to editing where the magic happens.

Steve was talking about writing, but this approach can apply to anything hard or new that we take on in life. Take action, fail, learn, and improve as fast as possible.

Lesson 2: Go for a Walk with Your Partner

Steve lit up when he started talking about the daily walk with his wife. It’s his favorite part of the day. They talk about everything from finances, parenting, business, goals, dreams, and more.

Two things jumped out to me:

1. They prioritize communication

2. They get outside

After experiencing the negative consequences of poor communication in a relationship, transparent communication is a must have for me. And maybe it’s because I’ve been thinking a ton about SPACE recently, but I love that they make time to get outside every day.

Steve’s statement seems crazy but I totally believe it’s true.

Lesson 3: Get Clear on What Game You are Playing

Steve’s differentiator is his ability to understand what is important to a client and write a book that showcases that.

He knows that the success of his business comes down to one thing: writing.

Sure, he needs to make sales calls, send out marketing materials, meet with clients, perform research, etc. But at the end of the day, if he can write incredible books then all of those tasks become insignificant.

That’s why Steve told me that there is only one game he is playing:

“How many mornings can I write?”

All of his decisions get filtered through that lens.

He wants to take a Ju Jitsu class? Sure, as long as it’s in the afternoon.

The client wants to meet on a bi-weekly basis? Of course, but not on Wednesday mornings because that will be 26 days/year he can’t write.

That clarity allows him to stay focused on what is important.

Lesson 4: Use Values to Guide You on the Path

One of the group exercises we completed at the conference was called Empire Expanders. On a sheet of paper, we listed our 5 core values across the top and the 5 people we spend the most time with down the left side. Then, we had to score each person based on whether they embodied our values.

Steve was reflecting on the exercise and thought it was interesting how many guys struggled to identify what their values are. He rattled his off right away because he had previously written them down thousands of times.

He values autonomy over his time, doing activities that give him energy, and having flexibility. This self-awareness led him to his life as a writer.

Be values driven and use them to guide you on your path.

Lesson 5: Finish the Important Stuff by Noon

I asked Steve what his daily routine looks like.

His response:

• 5 AM: Wake up and read non-fiction or a book related to a current project

• 7 AM: Walk with his wife

• 8 AM: Coffee, breakfast, and hang out with his wife

• 9 AM: 2-3 hours of writing time at his desk. No meetings.

• 12-5 PM: No more writing. Afternoons are fluid. Recently he has worked on building a guest house in his backyard, will take calls like the one with me, or answer any one-off emails to clients.

That’s it. As long as he reads, walks with his wife, and writes for 2-3 hours then it is a successful day. The rest of the day is just a bonus.

Get in the Room & Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help

An hour into the call Steve apologized to me for taking up so much of my time…

He was doing the opposite. I could’ve asked him questions for hours.

People love to help others who express genuine interest and are not transactional. I didn’t harass him at the event asking how to get more clients or for him to tell me everything he knows about ghostwriting.

We built a friendly relationship and I reached out from a place of curiosity without expectations. Now, I have an unofficial mentor, and who knows where it will lead.

What room do you need to get into to level up your business, relationships, or health?

Thank you for reading! As always please reply and let me know what resonated, what didn’t, or what you question. I love chatting about this stuff!

Cheers,

Andrew